for sure, there is a whole ocean in one drop.
but what is the point of making it so obvious?
xxx
there is a difference between the love heartbeat and
a wish that all the world would working as you please.
that is exactly what Katsu used the day before. yes.
大人しく。 obedience. i am that used to the fact that if i
say jump, people jump. and if i show my disagreement,
people would work out something to deal with it fastest.
it makes me sad, when text is not going back within a day.
when text is not going back within a week, i am irritated.(
i have been loving this person ever since because he was
the first and only person, who would not stop being himself
for me. who would not stop daily doing what he is doing.
who would take month to be back to me and i was still happy.
but because i am used to something else, it is just harsh.
it is been killing me ever since - that i can not hold him near.
can not make him do what i want him to do in the first place.
and one part of me was so happy about it.
we are not finished. but we are not going anywhere.
the situation of being stuck in the middle of nothing.
it is even worse than nothing itself.
i should so reattach myself for now.
sunrises in Shibuya hotels or whatever.
people just cry out for money in this case.
20 000 yen in some hours is definitely a
waste. but they have jakuzzi and mirrors. (love love love)
maybe i should reconsider. somehow.
no matter what is going on, life is going on.
and if i am not going on, i am just missing out.
one day he will be back to me.
or should i say, i will be back to that room.
until then, for what its worth.