that time long-long ago,
i was nineteen and i did not want to be a queen.
i was broken, distorted, on loose and with no aim.
yet, time has passed.
people abandoned me, double-crossed me, i betrayed too.
if i wanted to pretty much sum up this whole year,
i could say a lot of much of what you already know.
but.
i hated you more, than anything,
but.
i found and forgave you, i hold you.
for one night i would have sold all the souls in the world.
and i had it. i had even more, that i actually asked for..
this has been a good year.
i might be the worst selfish one, moody and heartless.
but i am me. and i love you. for what its worth.
...
mm.. i have earned a lot of money too!
can be added up as a yearly bonus?..)
i also got myself Christmas tree, lotsa chocolate and nice presents.
lingerie, cosmetics, new shoes (two), clothes, some interior stuff..
then my credit card passed out again
and i made a promise to never dwell on my heart again.
if i can not have something, i would just have to go round, m?
i will always have options. and it feels ultimately secure again.
and yes, i rule the world.