* cofee in a yellow bear mug and a letter from Francesca made my day <3
if only i could i would definitely run away for three day towdars Rome to see her.
my sister is adorable as always, as always warm and strong. adorably love *)

* yesterday made with bro plans towards 海外。
for now it looks like (starting now) --
february - Hokkaido, Halodate.
march - Kyoto, Osaka.
may/june - Hawaii (yay!)
august - Nara, Osaka, Kyoto.
august/sept - France/Netherlands +?
december - NY (LA?). <3

at least half of that is decided for sure.
no Russia there and i honestly do not know where to put it.
i mean, how it can be compared to Hawaii? *O*

i just knew that bro doesnt need visa to almost wherever else.
where is my japanese passport, aaaah! i am envious like hell.
he doesnt need visa to america as well. we should go to states.
i am sure, he will 似合う states. なんとなく感じているんだね。

* to think of it, he took the most tasty part of my sin out of it -
the feeling that it is only yours and not ever shared sin. damn.
for three weeks i didnt even feel the wish to return to the c/m.
because my sin became so つまらん and not interesting at all.
probably, i should do a right thing and change the sucking lust
with sucking knowledges out of those shelves. at least i am
ready to lend Genji Monogatari and Catcher in the Ray next visit.

yups, doing right things. am i not great, huh?

* begged bro to play cruel in bed. he honestly confessed that when
he put his hands on my neck he cant ignore the temptation of how
it feels to break it. just one time. one time will be enough for me, i guess.
fail. blackouts can be dangerous in our case, probably. i am so so sad *(

* i want cheese sandwiches and bro just mailed it is めんどい to buy cheese.
i am struggling within!

* people, living by rightshisness can not ever get the beauty of the sins.
in my position, they can be pitied. but it is about me, right. just the..
matter of choice, which stand to take, to think about it. one thing they get.
if they go and risk, they have nothing to return to and they lose all at once.
that is why we are different. we can always return to be the good ones.
they can never return, once choosing the bad side. because they do not know.
the rules and patterns of being bad. in the very end, it is about means, we use.
you can not use something, you dont know the 使い方。as simple as that?

* i want to make chocolate and send it to the central mansion.
the most excessive action in my decayed life to be brought into reality.

but i can not make chocolates, you know. which is the sad part *D