they say that hatred might actually hurt.
especially if it comes from someone, you once loved.
and it hurts even more if you keep on loving against.

but i would not give you that, no.
because that would imply that i feel something too.
that i somehow, deeply within and a little bit - care.

i do not.
that is why i will give you peace and unconcern.
indifference. it hurts as nothing much. even more.
i remember how i wish i were dead if not looked at.

i am busy. i am busy being in love and dancing within.
i am cruel, but i was not made for hatred. i hated much.

that is why, i will slip to nothingness.
i am so inspired to be mad for someone, something, all.

hatred would make it shade.
i want it as colorful as my black-black heart now is.